Camino Two: 2 Gravity, It Gets You Down.

OK. This post accidentally lost I will have to rewrite it

The snorers kept me awake some of the night. No biggie. In the albergues it’s normally lights out at 10.00 and people start to move around about 6.00am. See that’s eight hours and I never sleep that long, and you can be a kind of prisoner when you wake up at four. So the snorers,farters, tossers and turners help spread out your sleep.

People seem to want to be away really early so the overcrowded bunk rooms are busy. I lie still, like a stalking lioness, until most of them have left. Then I pounce on the weakest and take him back to the cubs to eat. No, not the last bit. Kidding. No, after the speedy departures have pushed off I have a bathroom to myself and can pack my bag in peace.

The earliest ones try to make no noise. They fail miserably. The more they try, the more irritating they become to the others. Zippers are zipped, rezipped, and zipped again. Sleeping bags are rustled into pouches. The bunk is searched time and time again. None of them could ever be successful at burglary. Even if you were out nextdoors would hear ’em.

I set off on day two. The profile looked largely downhill. It wasn’t. There were plenty of uphill bits. And, if you’ve done any of this hiking malarkey you will know that descents can be painful.

The problem with ups and downs is Gravity. It wants you on the level. If you want to go up it holds you back. Want to go down? Great, says Gravity, but you will do it at my pace. That’s about 120 miles an hour. Isaac Newton should have sorted this out way back when. He’s got three laws of motion. Wouldn’t have hurt him to have another where hills are concerned. No. Half a job Isaac if you ask me.

Anyway I hardly talked to anyone today. Too busy swearing and trying not to fall over. I did meet a Spanish guy with a dog. Apart from his huge backpack he had a wheely case. On this terrain. I chatted while he was resting. Five minutes after I left him the downhill section deteriorated. How the hell he got down there I have no clue. Maybe he didn’t and he died up there and the poor starving dog wouldn’t leave his body. Like that Scottish dog they built a statue of. Greyfriars Bobby. Probably not though. That’s just me. You have a lot of time to think on the Camino…

Later I passed the Korean Snorer from last night. He was sat under a tree out of the sun, eyes half shut. He can’t be tired I thought. He was the only one who got a good nights sleep. I nodded a greeting and as I walked past I gave him three quick snores. Yes. Now he knows I know.

I rolled into Zubiri not knowing where to stay. Maria, the owner of the first albergue, collared me and convinced me to stay there. I could have done a lot worse. There were two nice bars in town. The better one had wifi problems so I hit the other one to write up part one of the blog. I had it almost finished when I hit a wrong button and lost the lot. I’m using a tablet and it’s much more awkward than a lappy. By the time I’d rewritten it the bar was closing. At 8.00! In Spain! Zubiri is not like Madrid. Not at all. Me and two other drinkers took our drinks outside and the owner locked the place up. I was still connected to the wifi so I got finished.

Now that I didn’t need wifi I hit the other bar. They were busy but still closed at 9.00. Couldn’t believe it. Oh well, home then. There were a few peregrinos hanging around outside our albergue. A German woman was asking everyone where they were from and writing it in a book. She asked me.

‘HG One,’ I said.
‘That’s not a country,’ she said.
‘No, but it should be,’ I said.
I’m a massive snob about Harrogate and HG1 in particular.
She looked puzzled. I left it. Couldn’t be bothered playing stupid games when the pubs are shut.

• This story starts Camino Two : 1 Onward And Upward, Definitely Upward.
• Camino One starts Camino de Santiago: Preparation
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